Park Lane, W1K, and the crossing to the park side

The six houses, north to south

W1K 7TN, at the Marble Arch end, with the ballroom underneath it. W1K 1BE, the tall one, with the whole of the park laid out from the upper floors. W1K 1QA, set back behind its own forecourt. W1K 1PN, directly opposite and much the smallest of the six. W1J 7QY, on the Hyde Park Corner roundabout, and W1J 7DR, tucked into Hamilton Place behind it.

Nothing links this house to any of the six and nothing has ever been asked of one. They appear here because that is where guests sleep.

Getting across the road

There are pedestrian subways at intervals along the lane and crossings at either end, and the first time anyone tries it on foot they get it wrong. The practical answer is to come out of your hotel, turn towards the nearest subway rather than the nearest kerb, and allow three or four minutes. Your companion will already know which one is closest to your entrance, because she has done it before and because being asked to sprint across four lanes in evening shoes is not a good start to anything.

An hour in the park, before or after

The park gates stand open from five in the morning to midnight. In practice that means a ninety minute booking at £400 can begin with a walk down to the Serpentine and end with a drink indoors, and a four hour dinner date at £900 can put twenty minutes of trees between the table and the rest of the evening. In summer the light lasts until nine and the Rose Garden near Hyde Park Corner is worth the detour. In winter the lamps along the carriage drive do the same job differently.

Stations, and why nobody uses them

Hyde Park Corner is 3 minutes from the southern end on the Piccadilly line. Marble Arch is 5 minutes from the northern end, Central line. Green Park is 8 minutes east. That is the whole list, and it is why the lane is a road of cars rather than commuters. Your companion arrives by car in every case, and inside the first two fare zones the fare is already counted in the fee.

Arrivals, forecourts and lifts

Every one of the six has a forecourt or a turning circle, which means a car can pull in without stopping traffic and a guest can walk in without hurrying. Give Tamsin the hotel and she will give you an arrival minute. Your companion crosses the lobby to the lift without going near the desk; the room number travels to her at confirmation and to no one else, and the hotel is told nothing whatever.

Who books on the lane

Guests in town for two or three nights who chose the view deliberately and then found themselves eating in the hotel because the alternative meant crossing a dual carriageway. Guests attending something in one of the ballrooms who want an hour of ordinary conversation before the speeches. And a good number of long stays on the upper floors, who book two and three hour evenings and go out into the park in all weathers because it is there.

Who reaches Park Lane first

Jasmin is twenty-two, small and quick, keeps late hours and is often free at short notice for an evening on the lane. Nancy is thirty, golden blonde and unflusterable, and suits dinner bookings and overnight evenings rather than short calls.

Behind the hotels, Tina and Vanessa walk over from Mount Street in five minutes, Roxi and Tiffany come down from the square, and Angelika, Luna and Samanta are inside the same postcode.

Behind the lane, and across it

Mayfair begins immediately behind the hotels and runs east for half a mile. Mount Street is four minutes in from W1K 1QA. The square is five minutes north-east of the same point. Across the park at its southern corner lies Knightsbridge, eight minutes by car through Hyde Park Corner. Marble Arch closes the northern end and is attended on the same terms.